Summer is coming, and so is air conditioning, so when the heat gets here (likely mid-June), I've decided to get an early start on my contribution to the inevitability of "global warming," since our biblical "God" (Yahweh) very cleverly sent a rainbow to "promise" to never flood out the entire planet again!
BUT--
He don' say nuttin' 'bout no HEAT STROKE! So, I figure we ARE plunging toward the Sun, being sucked in by the huge gravity wave enveloping us. And, it's gonna get MUCH hotter! So hot that, when we're sucked into the Sun, the heat and the crushing gravity will squeeze everything down to sub-atomic particles, and that gravity-driven fusion will then squeeze protons together to form the nucleus of HELIUM! Then the electrons zooming around all over the place will spy those "nekkid" protons, and a pair will quickly lock into the first electron shell and form the atom helium (Atomic Number "2"), which is inert and won't chemically combine with anything else! FOREVER! Permanent "pussy" for those electrons!
SO, that satisfies the Hindu theory of reincarnation! We will all be "reincarnated" as helium atoms! Then another race of sentient beings on the planet "Zorg" will gather us up and pump us into airships, where we call all violently bump around into each other like shoppers at Macy's on "Black Friday," and we can float around inside their airships for Eternity!
("Goddammit! I grabbed that sweater first!”)
I've been trying to name this new religion, but Rev. Sun Myung-Moon has already created the "Unification" Church, so that idea is gone, UNLESS I can take it over and make it my own! Hm-m-m!
Howzzat? I think it makes MUCH more sense than the Bible! The Hindus were on the right track, but they just didn't know anything about quantum mechanics back then!
